The following morning a knock on the door awakened us.
”Who is it?” I asked.
“It’s Josh and Sammy. Can we come in?”
“Come in.” They entered and stood beside the bed.
“If you take Joni and Ray flying today, can we go with you?” Josh asked.
“If I take them, you can go too.”
“That’s all we wanted to know,” he said as they walked out closing the door.
I looked at the clock. It was seven fifteen. Sue was against
me, on her side facing away. I slid my hand up and down the curves
of her body.
“Sue,” I said, to see if she was awake.
“What?”
“What am I thinking?” I asked.
“You’re thinking I need another hour of sleep!” She replied.
“Close, but no cigar! I forgot to tell you last night that I love you.”
“I love you too. Good night!” She said. I smiled knowing she wanted to sleep a little longer.
I got up and checked on Jay. He was awake and looked so sweet lying
there peacefully looking around the room as though he was trying to understand
what was before him. I put my clothes on, changing his diaper and picked
him up sitting on the bed holding and looking at him.
Sue opened her eyes looking at us. “You two make a handsome couple.
I love you. You are a good father,” she remarked.
“Tell me that when I kick his butt out of the house one day,” I said.
“I feel that you and he are going to be very good friends,” she said smiling.
“See, you can see things beyond your own nose,” I said, smiling back.
“That was easy,” she replied.
“Do you know what I would like to do tonight?” I asked.
“What?”
“I would like to go to the drive-in, where we met. You can invite Bess and Jennifer if you want to.”
“I would love to do that!” She replied.
“Well, I’m going to take a shower and take him down with me.”
“Leave him here, I need to give him a bath,” she stated.
“Okay, I’ll see you down stairs.
Mom, Joni, and Genie were preparing breakfast as I entered the kitchen.
“Good morning!” I said, walking over to the bacon plate.
“Good morning!” they replied. I leaned against the counter, next to
mom. I reached and had a piece of bacon in my mouth before she could
say anything.
“Stop that! You can wait like everyone else!” She said slapping my hand.
“I love the smell of bacon cooking in the morning,” I said. They stood staring at me.
“I’m sorry! Did I break a taboo?” I looked at each of them.
“Daddy has done that same thing a thousand times.” Genie replied.
“I’ll be sure to pass that trait on to Jay,” I said.
I poured a cup of coffee and sat at the table. I noticed Genie continuing
to stare at me. I looked at her as I took a sip of coffee. She
continued staring and smiled.
“Do you have a news paper?” I asked.
“We sure do,” she said walking to the den retrieving it and sitting it in front of me.
“Thank you!”
Now I was getting funny feelings but wasn’t going to prejudge anything at
this time. I continued reading the paper and every few minutes she
would refill my cup. Each time I would say thank you.
“Good morning!” Taylor and Carrie said as they came into the kitchenette and sat at the table.
“Good morning!” Everyone said.
I handed the paper to Taylor, keeping the sport section.
“Thanks Jay, Honey, would you get us some coffee?” he asked Carrie.
“Sure! She said getting up. I was curious to see how Genie would handle the coffee now.
Dad walked into the kitchen saying, good morning. Everyone answered.
He walked up behind mom and hugged her from behind. Reached and took
a piece of bacon before she could stop him.
“I love the smell of bacon,” he said. They all looked at me as I shrugged my shoulders.
“Maybe he met my mom while he was TDY somewhere,” I said.
“Jay! Your terrible!” mom said.
“What was that all about?” dad asked.
“Jay came in the kitchen, stood next to mom and sneaked a piece of bacon.
Then said, I love the smell of bacon in the morning just like you have done
a thousand times.” Genie explained.
“He’s a smart kid,” he said winking at me. I smiled at him.
Genie brought her dad coffee and filled my cup.
“May we have a refill?” Taylor asked.
“Sure!” She answered. I still wasn’t ready to read anything into it.
“Good morning,” sue said walking over to me. I got up and slid the chair next to me, out for her to sit.
“That is so sweet Jay!” Genie said.
“He always does that for me. He’s always a gentleman,” sue replied.
“What about when no one else is around to see him act a gentleman?” Genie asked.
“Then he’s an animal!” Sue replied.
“Why are you two talking about this? Taylor, make your sisters leave me alone,” I said, teasing them about picking on me.
“Genie and Sue, Leave Jay alone today!” he said smiling at me.
“I can tell they’re really going to listen to you,” I stated.
“You’re the newest, you’re on your own,” he replied.
We all ate breakfast and sat around talking for a while. The kids kept bugging me about flying.
“Is it Okay with you dad?” I asked.
“Yeah, take my car,” he said handing me the keys.
“Okay let’s go, whoever wants to,” I said. When we got in the car, I had six, Mickey, Sammy, Josh, Joni, Ray, and Genie.
“I’ll take three the first time, one in the front and two in the back so you decide,” I said.
“Genie, Mickey, and Sammy go first and I’ll go with Josh, and Joni on the second flight.” Ray said.
After preflight and fueling, we took off.
“Wow! This is great!” Sammy said. They all agreed.
“I’m going to be a pilot when I get older,” Sammy continued.
“You can do anything you want to,” I said.
“This is really nice of you to do this.” Genie said thanking me for taking them up.
“I love doing it for them,” I replied.
“I want you to know that Sue is very lucky to have you,” she said.
“I’m the lucky one, Sue is so,” I hesitated for a second to find the right
word. “Perfect! Perfect in every way,” I said.
“You are too! I have watched you with the kids, Sue, and with all of my family,” she continued.
“I’m just trying to be a good father, but there is a flip side to me that
most don’t know about. You wouldn’t want to know that side either,”
I said, to warn her about some of her comments.
The boys were talking up a storm, pointing at everything. I knew they loved every minute of it.
“Are you having a good time?” I asked.
“Yes sir!” they said and continued pointing and saying.
“Look at that!”
“I know more than you think I do! She stated.
“I don’t want to talk about this in front of the boys, okay!” I said.
“That’s fine! We don’t have to talk at all,” she said sarcastically.
.
“Hey, don’t be mad! But what’s the point to this conversation?”
I asked. She looked out of the window as though she were ignoring me.
I said nothing else to her. We flew around for a few more minutes and
returned.
“Go wait in the lounge until we get back,” I said, just as I taxied up to
park. I shut the engine off, locked the brakes, and got out to help
them. I lifted Sammy and Mickey down and they ran telling the others
about it. I held my arms out to help Genie.
“I can get down myself!” She stated.
“You’re so pretty when you’re mad!” I said to ease the tension between us.
“That won’t work with me!” She said angrily and walking away.
“Your still pretty!” I said. She continued walking, turned to
me, and smiled. I knew that would work with her, the little bitch,
I thought to myself.
“Are you ready? I asked the others.”
“Yes sir!” Josh answered. Doug was five years older than I and
sat up front with me. Josh and Joni got in the back seat.
“Are you sure this is okay?” Joni asked.
“Don’t worry, everything is fine. We took off and I went up to three thousand feet and leveled off.
“This is fun!” Doug said.
I explained to Doug, “besides using a heading you pick objects on the ground to help you get to where you going.”
“It’s very simple to fly, do you want to try it?” I asked Doug. “Take the wheel!” I said.
I showed him how to do a figure eight and explained more about the instruments.
We were a little longer because I let Doug fly but we made it back and landed.
“One more time!” Mickey said.
“No, that is enough for today, maybe next time I come up.”
“When will that be, I miss my sister.” Genie said.
“How old are you Genie, twenty three?” I asked, looking over at her to let her know that I knew she was being childish.
“Don’t mind her, she’s spoiled,” Doug stated.
“I’m not!” She replied.
“Why do you always have to have everything your way? Coming over here,
you wanted to sit in the middle. Now you want the door,” he said.
I began laughing.
“What’s so funny?” Genie asked.
“You two sound like my brothers and sisters.”
An Awkward Situation!
After arriving at the house, the younger ones ran into the house telling everyone all about their experience.
“Sounds like they had a good time Jay.” Dad said.
“We did, but you may have to fork out for flying lessons soon,” I said, laughing while handing the keys to him.
“No way, they can join the army and go to flight school!” he responded.
“Yeah, but let them wait until the war is over!”
“What is the matter son? You don’t believe in the war anymore,” he said.
Everyone became silent knowing their father took the Vietnam War serious.
I looked at him thinking how to respond. I looked around and everyone’s
eyes were on me waiting for an answer. I had a sudden feeling that
this discussion could end in discord between Sue’s family and me.
“Dad, we need to talk about this later,” I replied and began walking up to
the bedroom room. I could feel the eyes staring at me as I walked up
the steps.
“It’s a simple question son!” he stated as I continued walking.
I entered the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed to think. I knew
that our views were different, and it may cause friction between us.
Several minutes had passed and the door opened slowly as I looked up at Sue.
“Can I come in?”
“Are you sure you want to?”
She closed the door and kneeled in front of me clasping my hands and looking into my eyes.
“I know however you feel about Vietnam, I’ll feel the same because I love
you, and I’m proud of you. I’ll stand with you against everyone if
I have to, even my own family,” she said as tears began forming in her eyes.
“I love you so much,” I said, with my eyes beginning to water.
“Jay, you wear The Medal of Honor, you don’t have to explain anything to
anyone. Just tell him you would rather not discuss it at all,” she
said trying to encourage me.
“He brought it up in the open, it needs to be discussed in the open,” I said.
I stood up lifting her with me. We put our arms around each other and stood holding one another a minute.
“It’s ironic, I have no fear of death but I fear your father not approving
of me. I can understand why David chose the army over college,” I said,
thinking of her first husband. “I just went through three years of
torment seeking my father’s approval and finally getting that settled in
my heart. Now I have to go through it again,” I said, sitting back
on the bed pulling her with me.
“No you don’t!” She said jumping up and running out the door, and down stairs.
“Sue, come back here!” I shouted.
She didn’t stop as I went after her. She reached her father before I made it to the top of the steps.
“Daddy why! Why are you trying to tear us apart?” She screamed
at her father as she reached the dining room where everyone had remained.
She was crying profusely as she got on her knees before her father.
Her mother ran to her kneeling down and putting her arms around her and began
crying.
“What is it Sue?” Her mother begged.
When I reached her, I took her by the arms and tried to pull her up but she held on to her father’s leg.
“Please Sue, everything will be fine,” I said, trying to calm her.
“Daddy, you don’t realize what you have just done! I won’t lose him!
When you say things that hurts Jay, It hurts me,” she said begging and crying
to her father. If he decides never to come in this house again I won’t
either,” she screamed. I pulled her up by force and held her as she
continued begging her father.
“Sue, I love your family. I’ll always come here no matter what.”
“I was only trying to understand your feelings about the war Jay. I didn’t mean to upset anyone.” Dad said.
“Daddy you don’t know what Jay has been through!” Sue said looking at her father continuing to plead.
“I have a pretty good idea Sue. I was over there twice.” Dad commented.
“She isn’t talking about that dad. Come over here and sit down Sue,”
I said, coaxing her to the seat at the other end of the table.
I sat in the seat next to her with my arm around her. This had gone
farther than I had anticipated. I need to explain before it goes any
further. I could feel her family had chosen sides and I didn’t want
there to be any sides. My throat had become dry. I walked over
to the sink to get me a glass of water. Glancing at Genie, I saw a
smirk on her face as I gave her a cocky but confident smile and winked.
Then walked to the table and sat with Sue, which by this time she had calmed
down.
“Dad, I probably have different feelings about Vietnam than you. It
isn’t cut and dry with me as it is with you. You probably saw more
death and destruction over there than I did, especially with two tours.
But my reasons for going over there were different from yours,” I said, thinking
of how to explain. Sue reached over holding my hand.
“Son, what you did over there gives you the right to your own opinion but
we joined the army for the same reason, to serve our country. If it
means going into battle then so be it. If we die in battle then so
be it. I would say that is cut and dry. You of all people should
know that. We do it for our country. If our sons go and die then
so be it,” he stated as if there were no other reasons.
“Dad, it’s hard to explain but even this very second, I have no fear of dying.
I never have. However, other motives have caused men to go to war.
A good friend of mine told me a story after we had gotten back from Vietnam
of how he ended up over there. His father was career army like you
and my father, who thought the same as you and my father. The army
meant everything to his dad. He loved his dad and knew it would make
him proud if he joined, so he did.
Soon after he entered, the girl he was madly in love with and wanted to marry
decided she didn’t love him anymore. She wrote him a Dear John letter.
This made him crazy because there was nothing he could do about it.
To top that, after his training, there was no assignment for him. He
just sits around the barracks, mowed lawns, and pulled KP for weeks on end.
After almost begging his CO for some type of assignment with no results,
he went AWOL. He stayed with a friend and lived it up for twenty-nine
days. He received a court martial and was fined.
Then it dawned on him that he had shamed his father by doing this.
His dad had become ill and he went to his dad to ask forgiveness but couldn’t
find the words simply because he was ashamed to bring up the subject.
After going home a couple of times to talk to his dad and never able to say
what he wanted. He made up his mind that the next trip, no matter what,
he was going to ask him to forgive him. However, his father died before
he could tell him. He endured the funeral with shame, as he stood with
his brothers, some who were still serving.
When he had gotten back to his post, he volunteered for Vietnam, but would
have to wait months to get orders. He didn’t care as long as he went.
This friend told me he wanted to die. He wasn’t going to commit suicide
or anything like that, but if he got over there, he could find a way to die
honorably. Then, maybe his family wouldn’t be ashamed of him.
My friend’s head was messed up. Everyone that knew him almost despised
him, but he met a beautiful girl that began to change his heart. He
began thinking maybe he didn’t want to die. The girl he met said that
her late husband had a scholarship to a university but the army drafted him.
Her fiancee at that time new it would make her father proud, although he
could have gotten a deferment, went in. They were married he went to
Vietnam and was killed.
My friend said he and the girl fell in love. Even so, nobody, not even
her family new what was really in his heart. Knowing she had lost one
husband over there, and knowing he didn’t intend to come home, he decided
to break it off completely. He told her that he knew in his heart he
wasn’t coming back. No matter what my friend said to her, she loved
him and said she was going to wait on him.
He went to Vietnam and soon forgot about her with everything that was happening.
He put himself into every situation that he could. Every time but twice,
he was untouched. In addition, each time these situations happened
they awarded him a medal. Soon he realized he had made it through the
war, but still, his father wasn’t home to be proud of him. Therefore,
nothing changed in his heart.
After he had made it home, his mind was still the same. Weeks had passed
and by chance, he was sitting with his mother telling her about what he had
been through because of the shame he had brought on his father. His
mother was saddened and began crying. She began explaining that his
father had told her before he died that he knew his son had made a mistake,
but paid for it. That he loved him still and was proud of him.
She should not worry about him that he would turn out all right. She
explained that his dad was going to tell him that the next visit, but died.
Because of her grief, his mother had forgotten and never told him what his
father had said. The boy realized then, his father loved him no matter
what he had done and finally made peace with himself. However, the
broken heart from the first girl he loved was still there.
He began thinking about the girl he had met before he went to Vietnam.
Knowing there was no possibility, she had waited for him as she said she
would. He at least owed her, by letting her know he had made it home.
He called and told her mother just to say he had made it home in case she
ever wondered.
In his heart, he knew he loved her and began thinking he would go to her
to see if she still had some feeling for him. He called her and she
agreed to listen to what he had to say. When he reached her house,
he found out that she had born him a son. Regardless of that, he explained
all that had happened and she still agreed to marry him. Soon he realized
all that time she had been true to her word and had waited. He would
then spend the rest of his life loving her.
Dad, I have not known you that long, but I love you and your family.
No matter how you feel about the war, I could never be disrespectful to those
feelings. Do you see now why our thoughts of this war are not the same?”
I asked.
Dad arose from his chair and approached me extending his arms. We embraced each other with tears.
“I’m proud to have you in this family, no matter what,” he said. All the family wept while hugging me.
Soon all was back to normal with the kids playing and yelling. The
adults were talking between one another and enjoying the time together.
However, I felt drained emotionally and went onto the porch. I was
smoking a cigarette when Sue came out and sat next to me holding my arm.
“My heart tells me that you handled that beautifully. Especially the part where he would love her the rest of his life.”
“Well! Your family knows more about me now than I do,” I said, grinning at her.
“I’m glad, they can see now what kind of man I have,” she replied.
“In most peoples lives there comes a time they will have to take a stand
for what they believe. I’m so proud of you for standing with me.
I love you so much it hurts. Thank you for what you did in there.
You deserve the Medal of Honor,” I said, kissing her.
We sat a while with our arms around one another.
Revisiting Old Grounds!
“Have you talked to Bess and Jennifer about tonight?” I asked.
“Yes, they are going to be here at five.”
As we sat, I was thinking of our past.
“That first night, what was it that made you follow me to the restroom?” I asked.
“I really don’t know. I was instantly attracted to you I just acted
on impulse. Maybe I saw Bess and Jen making a fuss over you so I just
made the first move.”
“What made you pick me instead of them,” she asked.
“That’s obvious!” I replied.
“The real reason!” She said.
“I had never talked so openly to a beautiful girl that wasn’t stuck on herself.
You were so friendly. When a beautiful girl as you, talks to a regular
person like me, it is like, hey, she spoke to me, and we walk around on cloud
nine for a week. Moreover, I had to take a chance on asking if I could
call you. I knew I would never see you again so I had nothing to lose,”
I explained.
“I’m glad you took that chance. I love you so much.”
“I’m the luckiest man on earth to have you.”
We went back inside with the others. At five o’clock Bess and Jennifer
arrived. We all sat around talking until six thirty. I walked
by Genie in the hallway coming from the bathroom.
“Jay, I’m sorry for acting that way at the airport,” she said.
“I did a little provoking my self Genie,” I replied.
“I heard what you said to daddy and I was ashamed to face you after that.”
“Now that I recall, you didn’t give me a hug did you?” I asked.
“No,” she said as I reached my arms out. She stepped toward me and we hugged.
“I love you!” She said. I put my hands on her cheeks and kissed her.
“I love you too. I had wondered what it would be like to do that!” I said, smiling.
“You’re a rat, you know that!” She said smiling.
“I always will be too! Do you want to go with us to the drive-in?” I asked.
“What’s showing?”
“I have no idea!”
“They might not want me to go.”
“Don’t be silly, I’m asking you to go.”
“Okay then!”
“I’ll go tell the girls your going with us so hurry up! We’re leaving
shortly,” I went to Sue’s room where She, Bess, and Jennifer were getting
ready and knocked.
“Is it Okay to come in?” I asked.
“Come on in.”
“I hope it’s all right with you, I invited Genie to come along.”
“Why did you do that?” Bess asked.
“I was talking to her and it seemed like the thing to do,” I replied.
“You’ve never been anywhere with her, she always wants to be the center of attention!” Bess explained.
“Not with Sue there!” I stated.
“You wait and see!” She said pouting.
“I said, not with Sue there!” I affirmed.
“Okay! But you wait and see!” She insisted, at the same time making me angry.
“Do you feel the same way?” I said, looking at Sue. She didn’t
respond but just looked at me. I walked out closing the door abruptly.
Walking to the steps, I heard the door open behind me.
“Jay stop! Please!” Sue asked.
I stood at the top step waiting. She walked to me and sat down on the top step.
Pulling my arm, she asked. “Sit down a minute,” I sat next to her looking into her eyes.
“Your eyes are beautiful tonight!” I stated.
“That isn’t what I want to talk about!” She stated.
“What then?” I asked.
“I know you’re angry, but you don’t understand. Bess was right.
Genie will want all the attention. If there are other boys, she flirts
with all of them. If we are trying to decide what we want to do, it
always ends up what she wants to do,” she explained.
“It’s a whole new ball game now. When you and I are together, you’re
the center of attention. Let me handle Genie! Okay!” I
asked.
“I’ll leave it up to you then,” she said, as though she still was unsure.
“Go get the girls and let’s go!” I said.
“We will be out in five minutes,” she replied.
I went down to find Genie. She was in the bathroom getting ready.
“Where leaving in five minutes,” I said, knocking on the door.
“I need more time!”
“We’re leaving in five minutes, with or without you!” I repeated.
I went and sat in the car waiting for them. I didn’t want to be an
ass, but I would prove a point if necessary. Sue, Bess, and Jennifer
came out and got in the car after I opened the door for them.
“Don’t start the car yet! You will waste gas!” Jennifer said. I started the engine to make a point.
“Give her another minute, she’ll be here. I said.
“Do you want to bet?” Bess replied.
“If she isn’t here in thirty seconds, I’ll leave her,” I guessed at the time,
then put the car in reverse, and began pulling out.
Genie opened the front door and I stopped. She looked at us and resumed
walking to the car. I saw a disappointed look on her face. I
got out and opened the door for her to sit next to Sue.
“You wouldn’t have left me!” She stated as she looked at me with a cocky expression.
“Maybe, maybe not!” I replied. I got back in the car smiling.
They were talking to each other most of the way there.
“Do you all really want to go to the drive-in? Why don’t we go to a club and get a drink?” Genie said.
“Which one do you want to go to?” I asked.
“We don’t want to go to any club!” the others answered.
“I don’t either, I’m going to drop Genie off at the one she wants to go to!” I replied.
“Ha, ha, very funny.” Genie remarked.
“Genie! This is our night out! We wanted you to come because
we thought you might enjoy it. I came because I want to reenact that
first night when Sue was all over me,” I said, smiling.
“That’s not true, I wasn’t all over you!” She stated. The others began laughing.
“ Jennifer! Bess! Do you remember when she followed me to the
Restroom? Well, she followed me into the men’s room wanting us to do
it in there! I said, laughing.
“He’s lying! I didn’t do that!” She shouted.
“Yes you did, I remember because I told you that I wasn’t that easy!” I continued laughing with them.
“Sue, I remember telling Bess that you had that satisfied look on your face
when you two came back holding hands!” Jennifer said. Genie was
laughing with us.
“You guys are crazy!” Sue said, being embarrassed.
“Is he like this all the time?” Genie asked.
“You never know when he’s going to do something like this!” Sue answered.
“That was funny though!” Jennifer remarked.
I pulled into the spot I thought was the same but wasn’t sure.
“This is the exact spot!” I said.
“If you say so.” They replied.
“Let’s get out,” I said, opening my door. We went to the front of the car. They leaned on the front while I stood.
“I need to go to the restroom Sue!” I said, smiling at her.
“Don’t start that again!” She replied trying to grab my arm.
“Genie, I was sitting on the hood where you are. This car pulled beside
us in that spot with three beautiful girls,” I explained, pointing to the
empty spot next to our car. “They got out and sat on the hood talking
and laughing. Every so often, I would look at them to check them out.
I felt they were checking me out too!” I said.
“We were checking you out!” Jen said.
“Hush Jen! This is my story!” I said, and continued. “I
wanted to make eye contact with one of them so I could say, hi! I think
we finally did. They asked if I had any more beer. Sure!
I told them and we went to the trunk and I gave them each a beer. We
introduced ourselves and immediately her beauty and charm struck my heart.
We ended up talking about our families and the rest is history.
“I had more charm than she did!” Bess said as we all laughed.
“It was hard to pick from the three of them. I began saying to myself, Ini, mini, miney, mo,” I said, smiling.
“You didn’t!” Jennifer stated.
“Jay, you’re so full of shit!” Genie blurted. I laughed at them.
“The movie is starting! Let’s watch it!” Sue said.
“Set here! Jennifer said bumping Bess over. I sat between the four of them.
“I’m the envy of this drive-in. Four gorgeous women surrounding me,” I said, putting my arms around them.
“Genie’s right! You are full of shit!” Jen said as they laughed.
“Okay! Take my imagination away from me,” I replied.
We spent most of the time talking and laughing instead of watching the movie.
I went after Popcorn and cokes twice with Jen and Bess. A couple of
GI's came over and we talked to them, but none of the girls seemed interested.
We left before the second movie ended. I looked at my watch and it
was twelve fifteen.
“Do you want to stop and get a drink?” I asked them.
“No, that was enough fun for me, thank you for inviting me. I really had a good time.” Genie said.
“We will go somewhere and get a drink next time we come up,” sue said.
“Then I can really let my hair down!” I said, smiling at them.
“You married a sweet guy with a wild sense of humor.” Genie stated to Sue.
“I know.”
“Why thank you Genie! You’re sweet too!” I replied.
We hugged and said good-bye to Bess and Jen after reaching the house.
They knew we were leaving in the morning. Genie went to her room, Sue
and I went up, took a shower together, and went to bed.
“How was you sister tonight?” I asked, as we lay there.
“You must have said something to her before we left,” she replied.
“I didn’t say anything to her. After a couple of gestures, I think she took a hint,” I said.
“I haven’t had that much fun with her in a long time,” she said.
“I’m glad you did,” I replied.
“Let’s play mind game, what am I thinking?” She asked.
“The same thing I’m thinking,” I answered. We kissed awhile and made love.
Everyone was at breakfast that morning. We spent a couple of hours
talking. Mom, dad, and the little ones drove us to the airport.
I put Jay in the back, inside his car seat as dad loaded our luggage.
Sue began crying with her mom. They hugged for a short moment.
“It’s going to be another nice day for flying!” I said, looking at dad.
“It sure is, you be careful up there,” he replied.
“Are you ready Sue?” I asked.
“Bye mom! Bye dad!” She said kissing them again.
Home again!
We arrived at the airport at three, and were at the apartment in twenty minutes.
“I really had a good time!” I remarked.
“I’m glad you got to see all of the family,” she replied.
“I really did, I really had a good time. Your whole family was nice,” I said.
“Do you think we will be able to make it again soon?”
“We will have to put back a little money for fuel!” I said.
“I’ll try to work a few more hours and use that money for fuel, will it be all right?” She asked.
“No! You need to be with Jay, I’ll try putting in a few more hours,” I demanded.
The next few months I spent most of my off time and money working on my instrument
rating. We were scratching for pennies a lot of the time. However,
Sue never complained, she was always selfless. She was very thrifty
with our money making every dollar stretch.
Mac, a friend of mine from work and Marcie his wife invited us to fly with
them next weekend to Atlanta to see a Braves baseball game. It was
their treat all the way, Mac owned the airplane, and he was paying for the
motel room. I had worked on his airplane several times during the past
few months. We had become very good friends and we both loved baseball.
A week ago while discussing baseball, I mentioned to him that I like the
Atlanta Braves. That is when he invited Sue and I to travel with them
to Atlanta. He mentioned that several of his friends had rented a skybox
in the stadium. That some of them were CEO’s and the others owned their
own business. Including wives, there would be twenty-two of us.
It would be an afternoon game and we would go to dinner after that.
Sue and Marcie had met twice before when we had gone to a couple of parties
that I was invited. She was looking forward to the trip. We didn’t
get out much because of our finances. I hoped that in the future I
could change that. As for now, she seemed content. I was too,
but I wanted more for her. I could never get her to go out much.
She would always say there wasn’t enough money. As long as she was
happy, everything was fine with me.
I had taken some of the money I had saved and bought her a new dress. I handed it to her in a box with a ribbon attached.
“What is this?” She asked, smiling.
“It is a surprise, something I have been wanting to get you for awhile,” I answered smiling back.
“What is it?”
“Don’t ask me what it is, open it!” She opened the box, took the dress
out, and held it up looking at it. Then she put it against her body
checking the size out.
“I love you in black. You can’t tell if it fits if you don’t try it on! Go try it on!”
“What did it cost?”
“Don’t worry what it cost, it was money I had saved to buy something for
me,” I think she knew that wasn’t the total truth but she didn’t question
further. She went to the bedroom to try it on. In a few minutes,
she returned. Her hair was up and she was wearing high heals with the
dress.
“You are the most beautiful woman in the world! Go take it off!
I don’t want anyone to see you in it. You can only wear it around the
house!” She looked at me somewhat funny.
“Are you serious?’ she asked.
“No, but you’re the prettiest woman in the world!” I stated and I walked
over to put my arms around her. As I was holding her, I put my face
in her hair.
“You smell so beautiful too.”
“I forgot to ask you what it was for.”
“For everything, and to wear to dinner after the ball game next Saturday,” I answered.
“It is so beautiful, thank you!” She stated.
“With all of the big money, men will be wishing they were me. I promise you that!” I said, being serious.
“I think with all the money floating around there will be some beautiful women there,” she said in response.
“I’m telling you right now, you will get more compliments than anyone else,
mark my word! Now, let’s go take that dress off, you have gotten me
excited seeing you in that thing,” I said, with a smile.
“Do you not think it is too short?” She asked.
“But elegant!” I replied, while we went to the bedroom. After
I helped her take it off, we lay on the bed. I pulled a spread over
us and we lay there for a while holding each other.
“I need to finish supper. Do you want to help me?” She asked.
“Sure!” We got up and she put her clothes back on. I set the table as she finished preparing the meal.
After supper, I helped with the dishes. We laid on the couch together
listening to music. The telephone rang and I got up to answer it.
“Hello, Hi Genie. No she left me for another man, just a second.
It’s your sister,” I said, handing the telephone to her. I went and
took a shower while she was on the telephone. As I was drying off,
I heard her still talking to Genie. With the towel around me I walked
to my closet, I pulled out a letter, sat on the edge of the bed and began
reading.
December 5, 1969, 7:45 pm.
My dear Love,
All day I have been thinking of you. I was so anxious to write this
letter to let you know how much I love you. Things were hectic at work
today but I felt at peace. I remained calm during it all by thinking
of you. I knew everyone was wondering how I could maintain a smile
with everything that was happening. It was easy thanks to you.
I love thinking of you. You make every day special.
Bess, I know sometimes wonders how I can hang onto something for so long
that she feels may be over, however, it doesn’t bother me. I know better.
I still talk of nothing but you when we are together. I see her shaking
her head sometimes. She just doesn’t understand the love we share.
I know we are on hold for now but it is only temporary. My love for
you isn’t on hold. It continues without ceasing. I’m more and
more realizing what true love means. Do you realize that I love you
more today than I did yesterday? At the rate my love is growing, soon
you will be the most loved man on earth. I still have a long wait and
the days seem to be getting longer but that is good. It gives me more
time to think of you.
Mom and I talk more often of you. She encourages me not to lose hope.
She has had to endure these long separations many times over the past twenty-eight
years with daddy. She said she didn’t want to hurt my feelings or be
disrespectful toward David but she felt closer to you. I really do
think she meant it. Sometimes she mentions your name before I have
a chance to.
Daddy said, “I sure miss that boy” a couple of times. I have never
heard him say that about David and it doesn’t bother me. I believe,
in his heart he wants things to work out between us. He noticed I was
feeling sad one day after you had gone and out of the clear blue sky, he
said to me. “Sue, that boy will come back to you someday,” I cried
long and hard because of what he had said made me so happy. I even
thanked him for saying it.
Genie says a different thing from one day to the next. One day she
says I shouldn’t fret over you and that I’m too good for the likes of you.
The following day she will say, hang in their Sis. I believe in my
heart that she’s jealous of my love for you. I wouldn’t say that to
her for fear I might hurt her feelings. I just smile at her and say
you’re the most loving and caring person on earth and she should be so lucky.
One thing I have learned about true love is that when someone you love is
going through difficulty in his or her life. That is the time to love
them more. I know what you’re going through is painful. I want
you also to know I love you and I’m going to love you through all of your
pain, until it is gone. There are no barriers between my love and you.
Remember to give me a kiss in your dreams tonight.
I love you forever, Sue
That was a beautiful letter. I would have been the luckiest man over
there to receive it. I would have been the envy of everyone but I would
never have let anyone read one. I really feel things would have been
different if I had these letters to read. I love her. I got up
and put that one back and pulled another one out and sat down.
March 9, 1970, 8:20 pm.
My Lover,
I hope no one reads this other than you. I would be very embarrassed.
You will not believe the dream I had last night. I woke up all sweaty
and sore between my legs. I remembered the dream I was having before
I awoke. You and I were making love as we always do. You were
on top thinking you were hurting me. I was yelling because it felt
so good but you thought I was in pain. You said you would make it feel
better and moved your lips and tongue down and began kissing me down there
saying you were making it feel better. I began screaming again because
it felt good but again you thought you were hurting me. I said, screw
me, and that would make it feel better so you did but I screamed again.
This went on all night, you trying to stop my pain but there was no pain.
I was screaming because I was enjoying it. That was the craziest dream
I have ever had and I’m still puzzled as to why I was sore.
Do you ever wish making love was telepathic? I do, especially tonight.
I want so much for you to make love to me. The way you kiss me and
move your lips and tongue across my body until you reach me down there.
It sends me climbing the walls. You also have a warm and soft touch
with your hands. I love the way you turn me over face down and caress
my body from head to toe, feeling all the curves of my body as though you
were memorizing me. That is the greatest feeling.
Don’t misunderstand this or take it the wrong way but I know you have had
lovers before me, because no one could do what you do for me as a novice.
When we finish making love, I feel so much more a woman. I feel so
complete I know there’s nothing in the world that comes close to making me
feel that way. I mean that with all the love in my heart. If
I awake in the morning and again I’m sore, I’ll know why.
I believe now you’re the most loved man in the world. My love has multiplied
that many times. Remember to kiss me in your dreams tonight.
Your Lover, Sue
I lay back with my head on the pillow placing the letter on my chest.
How could any person sacrifice so much when in reality there was no hope?
“Are you reading another one of my letters?” She said, surprising me.
“Yes. I’ll never understand you.”
“What is so hard to understand?”
“These letters, I’m moved by the passion that is consumed in them.
How could you still love me the way I treated you? Any other person
in this world would feel an equal amount of hate as you had love, especially
me. I have harbored that same amount of hate. Why did you continue
to love me when it would have been easier to hate? It doesn’t make
sense.”
“It does to me. I was angry at first. I felt the hate side.
It wasn’t that you loved someone else. It wasn’t flesh and bones.
I knew you loved me. I knew what ever it was that caused you to act
that way would eventually go away. You would then realize you have
never been loved as I love you,” she explained.
“I told you I wouldn’t be back and I walked away never looking back. I told you not to write, that I wouldn’t write back.”
“You left out the most important part. You said “I Love You” but I’ll
not be back. I had a feeling that since you were so adamant that you
weren’t coming back you had something planned. But I knew you loved
me and I was determined to wait.”
“What about this letter? I can’t believe you would write me about this?”
“Which letter is that?”
“The wet dream you had and how you wish making love could be telepathic,” I explained.
“I was sharing myself with you. You know, I’m human. I have the
same thoughts as every other person. I wanted you to know all of my
feelings.”
“I was just a little surprised,” I said.
“I have lain in bed so many nights wishing you were there making love to
me. I knew if I felt that way, you felt the same. If you had
written me, I would want you to tell me that you wish I were with you making
love.”
“Well, so far the letters have made me feel like a fool. At the same
time, they make me feel wonderful knowing someone loved me that much.
I want you to know I think you’re an amazing woman.